8.4

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 172 227 22397
HEX/HTML ACE3EF

CMYK 32 0 8 0

❝Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.❞

Phyllis Diller

8/4/18.

Today was quite a good day. I went to the mall with my running friends, and watched Mamma Mia! 2. It feel good to meet with these girls. We ate dinner together too. 

I took a hiatus from this blog. I don't know the reason yet, but July was a resting period for me. A lot has gone so far too. I took a video production summer camp, as well as a running club too. Unfortunately, I injured my right knee, but it's getting much better. I hope I can set a new personal record again this season. I really, really hope that I set new physical boundaries and achieve a sense of accomplishment. I hope I also become more productive for the new school year too. May tomorrow be a more productive day.

6.30

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 152 219 206
HEX/HTML 98DBCE

CMYK 40 0 25 0

❝Work without love is slavery.❞

mother theresa

6/30/18. Okay day.

6.29

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 164 237 221
HEX/HTML A4eddd

CMYK values n/a

❝We are saved by faith alone, but the faith that saves is never alone.❞

martin luther

6/29/18. Okay day.

6.28

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 147 230 180
HEX/HTML 93E6B4

CMYK 44 0 40 0

❝The Simple Path 

Silence is Prayer 

Prayer is Faith 

Faith is Love 

Love is Service 

The Fruit of Service is Peaces.❞

Mother theresa

6/28/18. Okay day.

6.27

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 168 213 186
HEX/HTML A8D5BA

CMYK 35 0 33 0

❝To have faith is to trust yourself to the water. When you swim you don't grab hold of the water, because if you do you will sink and drown. Instead you relax, and float.❞

Alan w. watts

6/27/18. Okay day.

6.26

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 155 225 152
HEX/HTML 9BE198

CMYK 32 0 42 0

❝There comes a time in your life when you have to choose to turn the page, write another book or simply close it.❞

shannon l. alder

6/26/18. Okay day.

6.25

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 168 213 186
HEX/HTML A8D5BA

CMYK 35 0 33 0

❝Love meant jumping off a cliff and trusting that a certain person would be there to catch you at the bottom.❞

Jodi picoult
second glance

6/25/18. Okay day.

6.24

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 169 238 138
HEX/HTML A9EE8A

CMYK Values N/A

❝Some things have to be believed to be seen.❞

Madeleine L'Engle

6/24/18. Okay day.

6.23

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 213 244 225
HEX/HTML D5F4E1

CMYK values n/a

❝Faith is about doing. You are how you act, not just how you believe.❞

mitch albom
have a little faith: a true story

6/23/18. Okay day.

6.22

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 167 217 188
HEX/HTML A7D9BC

CMYK 37 0 31 0

❝Be Brave and Take Risks: You need to have faith in yourself. Be brave and take risks. You don't have to have it all figured out to move forward.❞

Roy t. bennett
the light in the heart

6/22/18. Okay day.

6.21

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 164 237 221
HEX/HTML A4EDDD

CMYK values n/a

❝I know now, Lord, why you utter no answer. You are yourself the answer. Before your face questions die away. What other answer would suffice?❞

C.S. Lewis

6/21/18. Okay day.

6.20

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 140 215 172
HEX/HTML 8CD7AC

CMYK 0 0 20 0 / 0 37 0

❝The function of prayer is not to influence God, but rather to change the nature of the one who prays.❞

SØREN KIERKEGAARD

6/20/18. Okay day.

6.19

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 174 228 181
HEX/HTML AEE4B5

CMYK 32 0 35 0

❝I talk to God but the sky is empty.❞

SØREN KIERKEGAARD

6/19/18. Okay day.

6.18

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 155 199 165
HEX/HTML 9BC7A5

CMYK 48 0 45 0

❝None of us knows what might happen even the next minute, yet still we go forward. Because we trust. Because we have Faith.❞

Paulo Ceolho
Brida

6/18/18. Okay day.

6.17

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 173 223 187
HEX/HTML ADDFBB

CMYK 0 0 16 0 / 0 23 0

❝All I have seen teaches me to trust the Creator for all I have not seen.❞

Ralph waldo emerson

6/17/18. Okay day.

6.16

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 200 239 151
HEX/HTML C8EF97

CMYK 19 0 39 0

❝Sometimes beautiful things come into our lives out of nowhere. We can't always understand them, but we have to trust in them. I know you want to question everything, but sometimes it pays to just have a little faith.❞

Lauren kate
torment

6/16/18. Okay day.

6.15

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 184 210 163
HEX/HTML B8D2A3

CMYK 31 0 39 0

❝The function of prayer is not to influence God, but rather to change the nature of the one who prays.❞

Søren Kierkegaard

6/9/18. Okay day.

6.14

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 188 225 148
HEX/HTML BCE194

CMYK 28 0 45 0

❝Never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a known God.❞

Corrie ten boom

6/14/18. Okay day.

6.13

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 185 238 163
HEX/HTML B9EFA3

CMYK Values n/a

❝And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.❞

anonymous
holy bible: king james version

6/13/18. Okay day. Grandma's (Dad's side) birthday today!

6.12

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 183 227 148
HEX/HTML B7E394

CMYK 26 0 40 0

❝I have great faith in fools - self-confidence my friends will call it.❞

Edgar allan poe
Marginalia

6/12/18. Okay day.

6.11

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 194 206 154
HEX/HTML C2D89A

CMYK 27 0 48 0

❝Faithless is he that says farewell when the road darkens.❞

J.r.r. Tolkien
The fellowship of the ring

6/11/18. Okay day.

6.10

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 196 225 222
HEX/HTML C4E1DE

CMYK 23 0 10 0

❝“I believe in everything until it's disproved. So I believe in fairies, the myths, dragons. It all exists, even if it's in your mind. Who's to say that dreams and nightmares aren't as real as the here and now?”❞

John lennon

6/10/18. Pretty good day.

6.9

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 177 228 227
HEX/HTML B1E4E3

CMYK 23 0 10 0

❝Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.❞

DR. SEUSS
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!

6/9/18. My 15th Birthday!

Today was quite a good day. I lost my left lens in the morning. But mom forgave me because she wouldn't get mad at me. Anyways, I ate seaweed soup (traditional birthday meal). After that, we went to the Spectrum to shop and eat. We ate at the Cheesecake Factory which I ate an avocado toast. Then, we went to shop for my shorts. I don't know why I was acting up again but it was because mom wouldn't approve of anything I wanted to wear. I heard a little girl hold up a slightly exposing shirt and showed it to her mom and said "Daddy would kill me". It made me so sad that even her dad (or parents) wouldn't let her wear the clothes that she wanted (kind of reminded me of me too). But still I got the shirt that I wanted. It was kind of hard for me because I saw the look on mom's face and it looked like she was disappointed. But the thing is, it wasn't something that would show so much of my chest or body. It was something "normal" that girls would wear at my school, everyday. I bet that their parents wouldn't even care. But why do my parents care? Maybe it's their Asian upbringing and culture. I can't wait for college so I can actually shop for my own clothes without having to waste time thinking "What will Dad/Mom think of it?". Anyways, I got some really expensive shorts (for running). I might sound a bit selfish right now though. It was a pretty good day despite the thing with mom and me. My grades are all at an A or an A-, but science is still at a B+. I really hope I end up with all A's (range) this semester. I want summer break to be a replenishing break for me. I have so many goals ahead of me and I want to complete all of those with 104 days.

6.8

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 157 232 159
HEX/HTML 9DE89F

CMYK 36 0 48 0

❝Don’t waste your time in anger, regrets, worries, and grudges. Life is too short to be unhappy.❞

Roy t. bennett

6/8/18. Today was the LAST day of school! I wasn't too elated or too unhappy for it. It was just another "regular" school day that ended much quicker. I took my math final which I thought I did well on but it turned out to be the opposite. My Math grade didn't plummet too much though. Anyways, after school, my friends and I went to go eat lunch. Of course, it was the end of school and there were so many people at the same place my friend and I were supposed to meet at. Anyways, I saw a couple of my friends that sit with me at lunch. (The "only" friends I actually have). It sucks when there are so many people you know, but you can't make out the words and say "hi". Of course, my mind started doing that thing where I would self deprecate again and again and again. I don't really know if this (pantone) color fits the day. It was more of a bittersweet day for me. (It's funny to me how the quote is contradicting how I felt today). I feel like I'm getting depressed. I feel so, so, so hollow and empty and I feel like I'm getting even more fake to my friends. I'm so worried that I might lose them because I'm not acting "normal".

During summer break, I hope my emotions heal and I begin to think more positively. I know that I quit music in order to take video production, but now this other part of me is saying that I'll regret that decision.  I felt that playing my instrument was an outlet to stop thinking about what I was worrying about. Especially because I played the horn for so long and I love it so much. It feels like I'm losing a part of me, but at the same time I thought it was the right decision at the time. I need to make a life plan. Now I feel terrible writing this.

May tomorrow be a way better day.
It's my birthday tomorrow too.

6.7

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 200 239 151
HEX/HTML C8EF97

CMYK 19 0 39 0

❝A man who dares to waste one hour of time has not discovered the value of life.❞

CHARLES DARWIN
THE LIFE & LETTERS OF CHARLES DARWIN

6/7/18. Today was a better day. I had my English final exam which went by quickly. I really, really hope I do well on it. Again, usual, I slept late studying for the test. Luckily, my History and English grade both rose to an A-! I couldn't believe it. But now, I have to pray that I'll do well on my Science test which my grade hasn't come out yet. May tomorrow be a better day.

6.6

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 191 222 141
HEX/HTML BFDE8D

CMYK 0 0 47 0

❝A man who dares to waste one hour of time has not discovered the value of life.❞

Charles darwin
the life & letters of Charles Darwin

6/6/18. Today was an okay day. Again, I fell asleep super late last night (today morning). I'm kind of disappointed in myself that I procrastinate too much but I hope I do well on something for once. I need to do well on my English final. That is just the one final that I am most concerned about. But look what I'm doing right now. Wasting yet another day on this stupid blog. I hope I do really well on this final. May tomorrow be a better day.

6.5

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 211 226 127
HEX/HTML D3E27F

CMYK 0 0 55 0

❝You can have it all. Just not all at once.❞

Oprah Winfrey

6/5/18. Today was a better day. I had my english performance which went better than expected. But then at the same time I hate myself for having such bad grades. All of them have been going down. I hope I do better since I only have a week left of school.

6.4

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 229 207 97
HEX/HTML E5CF61

CMYK 0 6 72 11

❝Knowing too much of your future is never a good thing.❞

Rick riordan
the lightening thief

6/4/18. Today was an okay day. I had my history debate which went by super quickly. I forgot what I say instantly after I gave my closing statement. I kind of stuttered, but not too much, I hope so. Then I had my science final which I kind of failed (75%). I hate the science department at my school. My teacher was also trying to rush everything during the test. Anyways I forgot about that too cause, well, colleges don't look at your transcripts from freshman year right..? I hope so. I want to do better next year. I promise myself I will not get another B on the report card. Anyways, after I ate dinner, I went out for a run with my friend and ran about 3-4 miles. I'm reading this book called It's Kind of a Funny Story, and the main character, Craig, deals with something I recently felt. Well, he's clinically depressed, but I love that book so much because I can actually related to someone, at least, a fictional character. I hope tomorrow is a better day.

6.3

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 233 156 52
HEX/HTML e99c34

CMYK 0 45 94 0

❝Instead of worrying about what you cannot control, shift your energy to what you can create.❞

Roy t. bennett
The Light in the heart

6/3/18. Today was a bittersweet day. I studied for my science final for more than six hours now, but I'm still stuck on every single unit. Ugh, I wish I got an A for putting in effort. God, I really hope I get an A on this. I have the history debate too, tomorrow. It really sucks because I wanted the last week of school to just be relaxed. But then again, we have finals all crammed like mine are. I hope I do well, please... Anyways at like six in the evening I went outside to meet with two of my friends. Actually, one of them I met today for the first time. She was super talkative, too much for my liking. I was just dazed and was super lost because I had so much on my mind when she was talking (rambling). I was super overwhelmed of how fast she talked. Anyways the friend I was already friends with came to join the table after like fifteen minutes. We ate and talked. I was kind of stressed out by how happy they were because I was having so much on my mind, meanwhile they seemed to be having the time of their lives. Anyways I came back home being super anxious. I didn't feel good but Mom knew that something was wrong. She tried talking to me, but I was already so fed up with finals and exams and what happened at the meeting with the two friends. It took me more than ten minutes to open up until she finally convinced me to spill something out. She talked me out some stuff, but at the time I was still feeling anxious. But as always, she actually cared for me, and I could feel that. I felt so guilty for being so selfish and rude to her for the past three years (ever since I started acting like a brat to her). I felt like I needed to be a better daughter. I promise myself I will never talk back to her. I feel so sorry for Mom. She had to put up with all my crap but still she didn't let all my rude comments break our relationship. I regret every single thing that disappointed her. But I will make it up to her. May tomorrow be a much better day.

6.2

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 233 182 103
HEX/HTML DFB667

CMYK 0 16 60 9

❝Instructions for living a life. 

Pay attention. 

Be astonished. 

Tell about it.❞

MARy oliver

6/2/18. Today was an okay day. I slept late again without doing much.

6.1

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 122 204 0

HEX/HTML 7ACC00

CMYK values n/a

❝In a dark place we find ourselves, and a little more knowledge lights our way.❞

Yoda

6/1/18. Today was a good day. I realized that I have a lot of work ahead of me, especially because finals are in the last week of school. I can't believe that it's already the end of my first year of high school. I had my last band concert. It was a memorable experience because I knew I had to try my best once more. I need to start my work soon. May tomorrow be a better day.

5.31

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 169 230 117

HEX/HTML A9E675

CMYK 29 0 45 0

❝More smiling, less worrying. More compassion, less judgment. More blessed, less stressed. More love, less hate.❞

Roy t. Bennett
The light in the heart

5/31/18. Today was sort of a good day. I felt much better than two days ago. Nothing much occurred today too. It was just like one of those "normal" days. I got my yearbook today from school. My birthday is in 10 days!

5.30

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 199 226 153

HEX/HTML C7E299

CMYK 22 0 46 0

❝Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies.❞

Mother Theresa

5/30/18. Today was much better than yesterday. I think I was having a mood swing, so that's what happened. Nothing much happened either. Everything seemed back to normal. I accidentally slept really late yesterday too. I think part of why today was a bit better was because I got to play my instrument in the morning. (I also got into the highest level band for next year, but I'm not doing it next year, lol.)

5.29

COLOR VALUES:

RGB 220 68 5

HEX/HTML DC4405

CMYK 0 79 100 0

❝Forget yesterday - it has already forgotten you. Don't sweat tomorrow - you haven't even met. Instead, open your eyes and your heart to a truly precious gift - today.❞

Steve maraboli
Life, The truth, and being free

5/29/18. By far the worst day of 2018. I had a hard time falling asleep last night, making me to feel super anxious. My thoughts raced in my mind and I couldn't make myself feel relaxed. Then again, I woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning and then I felt out of place the whole morning. I felt my eyes fill up with tears as soon as I stepped afoot at school. I had no feeling, but an emptiness and hollowness inside me. Then during break, I completely lost it and started to cry in front of my "friends". Then I realized that none of the people that I sit with noticed that I was crying. I felt like nobody cared about me, and felt even more anxious and invisible. Then it was advisement, and sat next to my usual group of friends. It literally took my friend for more than half the class to notice that I was clearly crying. I thought I did everything to care for her when she was once having a bad day. Then I realized that she doesn't care about me. What did I ever do to her? I felt like I meant nothing even though I tried every way possible to make her feel better when she was feeling upset. Then it was time for my english class. I felt like every inch of my body was about to throw up at the thought of performing in front of the entire class. I told my teacher, then she sent me to the counselor. I went then spilled out everything that was gnawing at my thoughts this entire time (I mean by everything since I moved here). I was bawling my eyes out. Even my own words surprised me because I was so used to not opening up to anybody because no person would ever care when I needed help. Then lunch came and I felt so alone. Yesterday, my group of friends went out to hang out without inviting me. Technically, they made a group chat saying that they wanted to hang out sometime, but they went by themselves without telling me the location or time. I felt like I wasn't even a part of them anymore. Why would they forget that I was their friend? Then I went to my math class and took the end of the year test. I went to cross country practice and didn't do anything because I didn't feel like running. Anyways, I hope tomorrow is a much better day than today.